Thank-you God...

Hey God
I know I prayed to you earlier and I am upset with the condition I was in. I was at the park that I have gone to ever since I was a child. You know that creek the runs by there isolated from the sidewalk? It is my favorite place in the whole park. I know you know that I went there right after my jog and just broke down. I am doing my best. You know I am. I wish you could just poof my prince charming right in front of me already, but I realize that there is a path I am meant to take where I am going to have to work on myself more than I think I need to.

But, Thank-you. Thank-you for everything. Thank-you for my papa. Thank-you for my mama. Thank-you for my whole family. As much as they tend to get on my nerves, sorry, but I know you have blessed me with a family that truly love me unconditionally, just like you do. I am pushing myself to get out of this. I catch myself imagining how different I can become if I were to let this eat me up. Where I would be if I just entirely gave up on romance, on me, and on you? Thank-you for giving me the imagination I have because without it, I would not be able to see how lost I would be if I were to just give into this anger, pain, and betrayal...and so much other stinking emotions I wish I never felt. EVER.



Thank-you for my friends. Thank-you for my Teresita. You know how I just came home not too long ago from visiting her. I was happy. I was calm. I know that she knows that I am hurting, that I am struggling but not falling, she knows all of that. She has this way of just taking in every word that comes out of my mouth and understand. I did not even have to mention anything about how my day was, she can already imagine. Thank-you so much for sending me her and for letting me keep her. She has this way of making me forget all of my problems and shut down my thoughts while she is around. Thank-you SO much for friends. Not just friends, but really GOOD friends. I know not alot can say that they can name a few people that have been there at their most important times in their lives, but I can. And I pray for those that deserve friends like I have to find that. Thank-you for sending them to be my rocks when I become weak.

You really are amazing. Even though alot of this does not make sense. None of this does. I give you my all. Take the reins and just steer me to where I need to go. I hope you are proud of me.


Amen,
Annie